The Librarians: Lessons from Ezekiel Jones
by Alasse Fefalas
Summary: A collection of one shots where Ezekiel Jones teaches his colleagues how to do crime.


**Lessons from Ezekiel Jones**

 **1\. Pickpocketing**

By Alasse Fefalas

"No, no," Ezekiel tutted, shaking his head as he crossed his arms. "Don't use your whole hand. If you can't lift it with two fingers, don't lift it at all."

"This is harder than I thought it would be," whined Cassandra. She pushed the wallet back into the brown formal jacket that was hanging on the back of a chair. The bells that hung off the bottom of the jacket from crocodile clips jingled with the movement.

"Nah, it's just practice." Ezekiel grinned. "I've had plenty before. You're just a beginner."

He walked up to the jacket and held up two fingers. In one swift, fluid movement, he dipped his fingers into the jacket pocket and pulled out the worn brown leather wallet without making any bells move. "See, two fingers. As little movement as possible," he explained.

Cassandra watched as he pocketed the wallet again, barely making a sound from the bells. She took a deep breath and followed his movements. Sticking out two fingers, she plunged them in soundlessly and caught the wallet between her fingers. Tightening her grip, she pulled her prize upwards and out. The bells jingled slightly.

"Oh hey!" she exclaimed happily. "It didn't jingle that much!"

"Awesome!" cheered Ezekiel. "Now we just gotta work on your hand direction, then you'd be pickpocketing by tonight!"

Cassandra tilted her head slightly. "Hand direction?"

"It's not just straight up all the time. You have to angle your wrist so that it's the same direction as the exit," he said.

Cassandra nodded. "I see."

"But then, you could always add a little bit of distraction to hide any small movements," laughed Ezekiel.

"Oh! Like when you bumped into Flynn to get the Apple!" Cassandra's eyes lit up at the memory.

"Exactly!" he said.

"What are you guys doing?"

Both of them turned towards the Back Door, where Eve and Flynn had suddenly appeared through the doors. She had her arms crossed in front of her and an eyebrow raised. Cassandra immediately hid the wallet behind her back.

"Hey, isn't that my jacket?" Flynn asked, pointing at the jacket draped over the chair.

"Uhh… no?" denied Ezekiel, shaking his head.

At the same time, Cassandra went, "Maybe?"

Walking over, Flynn picked up the jacket, making all the bells attached jingle. "Oh hey! You made it into a pickpocket training jacket!"

"Pickpocket training jacket?" echoed Eve. "You can't seriously be teaching Cassandra how to pickpocket!"

Ezekiel immediately pointed to Cassandra like a little kid caught red-handed. "Hey! She was the one who asked me!"

"Why?"

Cassandra shrugged. "I just thought it'd be fun to learn."

Eve opened her mouth to reply but she was cut off by Jake who walked in, asking, "Hey, has anyone seen my wallet? I can't seem to find it anywhere…"

Cassandra held up the wallet. "Is this it?"

"Oh yeah!" Jake replied, his eyes lighting up. "I thought I lost it somewhere in Lima..."

Cassandra gave him a rueful smile as she handed it over. "Sorry, Ezekiel borrowed it for a while."

Jake shot Ezekiel a dirty look as he pushed the wallet into his back pocket.

"And by borrowed you mean lifted it, don't you?" Eve sighed, shaking her head.

Ezekiel shrugged nonchalantly. "Rule number one of teaching how to steal: never use your own stuff."

Jake gave him a hard smack on the arm. "That's for stealing my wallet!"

"Now, now," Flynn said calmly, grinning at the three junior librarians. "There's no need to fight. It's quite a useful skill to know, actually. Especially if you need to take something from another person without him or her noticing."

Eve narrowed her eyes at him. "You're only saying that because you know it."

"Well, true. But I think Cassandra would agree with me," Flynn said, turning to the redhead.

Cassandra giggled and waved the same brown wallet that she had handed Jake just prior. "Dinner's on Jake!"

Jake gaped at the item in her hands. "How-how did you even-?!"

"It's called pickpocketing, mate," laughed Ezekiel. He clapped a hand onto Jake's back. "You should learn it one day!"

Jake turned to Eve, hoping for a little backup from her. Shrugging, she said, "Well, at least I'm not buying dinner."

"So what do you guys wanna eat tonight?" asked Ezekiel cheekily. "I feel like having a little steak!"

"No," growled Jake.

"Ooh, that sounds nice!" said Cassandra.

Jake glared at Cassandra. "Don't encourage him."

Flynn laughed. "I think it's a wonderful idea! We should celebrate Cassandra's new skill!" he said gleefully. Sidling up to the younger girl, he continued, "Besides, Colonel Baird is paying for dessert. So why not?"

Eve recognised the black wallet Flynn was juggling in his hands. Hers. "Hey!"

Laughing, Flynn grabbed Cassandra's hand and ran out the door. Ezekiel grinned and hurried after them. Eve rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. She clapped a hand on Jake's back and pushed him along with her.

"We should go make sure they don't order the most expensive thing on the menu," Eve conceded. She couldn't stop them from stealing her wallet but she sure as hell could sure they didn't empty her bank account. Not on her watch.

Fin.

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A/N: Oh my goodness it took me so long to write this. Sorry for the bad and messy writing. It's all over the place, urgh. Thank you, anon, for the prompt! Sorry I couldn't do it justice. I'll do better next time, I promise.

I wanted to save this for the librarians fanfic week but I decided to write Evlynn all week and there's none in this one... which is why I'm posting it up before then.

I hope you guys did enjoy the story though! Thanks for reading!


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